I Guess I Need To Catch Up … Huh?

I didn’t realize it had been so long since I posted anything. Time is KRAZY this time of year and finding time to do sometihng so simple as update a blog can be almost impossible. I may have to do this in bullet format but I assume that will be better than nothing at all … Personally I like bullets

1. Work is KRAZY busy but not a day has gone by that I have not learned something so that makes all the KRAZY worth it.

2.  In my last post I announced a new addition to our family and breifly elaborated to some concerns. I can update now and tell you that we have no need for concern. Heather is not as far along as she thought so the things that caused the concern was eliminated from the picture.  Now all we have to do is pray for a happy, healthy, baby due sometime the end of August.  We’ll get to pick the date as she is mandatory C-Section, moreso because of the little town that we live in than anything else. She does have a back injury that could be seriously aggravated with a long labor or hard delivery and it’s best we avoid that if at all possible. So we’ll be picking a date sometime over the summer. We’re excited and hoping for a girl this time!

3.  Lil Man celebrated his 3rd birthday in style with several of his friends and lots of good food. He had a great time and the fellowship was wonderful.

4. Lil Bit will be celebrating his 1st birthday in a few weeks.  I haven’t even thought about a party theme, where we’re going to have it, or who we will invite, or when we’ll actually have it.  I’m thinking about waiting till closer to spring time and having it outside where the kids can actually run and play. Maybe have a cookout or something of the like.

5. My landlord has offered to sell me the home we are living in, owner financed!  I’m not sure that is something I want to do though. Don’t get me wrong … I absolutely LOVE our home … but I’m not sure I want to be a home owner.  I know someday my family will consist of ME and ME alone. Someday Heather will leave home and make a home for herself and her babies.  Someday Stasha will grow up and Peyton and will maybe go live with her … or maybe not.  At any rate it will be only ME and I’m not sure I want to be responsible for a big house.

6. Speaking of Stasha … My baby … Today she turns 21. It’s hard to believe my baby is 21 years old. What is even harder to believe, or maybe accept, is that she has chosen to cut her family out of her life. My heart is heavy and it HURTS to think of where she is in her life right now. She is my flesh and blood, but she has made her choices and I am not a part of them, neither is her son. That is the truly sad part. All I can do is pray and trust that someday her eyes will be opened and she will finally see what she is missing out on. Maybe someday … at any rate … Happy Birthday baby girl … no matter what I still love you and I miss you dearly.

7.  And FINALLY . .. the lyrics to a song that I identify with – Grace – Martins

I was in prison, locked up in chains sin held me captive
to sorrow and pain, years of frustrations as love passed me by
until the Master heard my hearts cry

For grace marvelous grace, I needed grace to pardon and make
me whole grace marvelous grace flows from above with infinite love
marvelous grace

woohoo

I was downhearted I was broken inside praying for mercy with
nowhere to hide, there was a solace searching for me grace
everflowing that set my soul free

For grace marvelous grace I needed grace to pardon and make me
whole grace marvelous grace flows from above with infinite love
marvelous grace

I am forgiven
I am redeemed
A brand new creation He saved me and gave me a reason to sing

Grace, Grace God's Grace grace that will pardon and cleanse within
Grace, Grace God's Grace grace that is greater than all our sins

For Grace marvelous grace flows from above with infinite love
Marvelous Grace

Now I Can Talk About IT

Somedays you want to shout things to the world but you have to hold your tongue until order takes place. That is how things were for me the past 24ish or so hours.  I’ve held on to news, only sharing it with those I knew would not come in contact with immediate family members and say something before said family members knew. This morning I broke the news to said family members so now I can share my news with everyone … including my few blog readers …

I’m going to be a GRANDMA … again!

Feeling are mixed … emotions are high … we have some worries … but we know God is in control.

I’ll share more details after my daughter’s doctor appointment on Wednesday … until then please keep us all in your prayers.

OH … BTW … Lil Man turned 3 years old yesterday … our baby in Heaven would have been 21 months on the 18th … Lil Bit was 10 months old on Tuesday … and we think the new baby is due sometime around the first of June.

I’ll share birthday posts and new baby news as soon as I can grab a few free minutes.

What’s A Santa To Do?

Back on a warm summer Saturday afternoon Heather and I was out with the boys doing our regular every Saturday afternoon errands. We pulled into a parking lot and parked beside another van that had a battery powered kids ride on toy strapped to the top. Of course Lil Man decided right away that is what he just had to have. I explained to him that this kind of toy is not something you go out and buy everyday. This kind of toy was … I thought for a minute and then I responded … This is a SANTA toy. He looked at me quizzically and I explained to him that if he was really a good little boy then maybe Santa would bring him one of these particular ride on toys for Christmas. Boy – OH – Boy! Lil Man has not forgotten our talk about Santa and the Christmas toy.  He has said many times over again that if he was a good little boy then Santa would bring him ‘this ride on toy’ for Christmas.  Of course I would always be sure to stop and ask him what Christmas is all about and he will quickly tell me that Christmas is Baby Jesus birthday … no hesitation. I want him to be excited about Christmas but I also want to make sure he understand the true meaning of Christmas. I’ve done a good job … I think.  He will talk to us about Christmas and celebrating Jesus birthday without any mention of trees, food, toys, etc so I feel very good knowing that he understands Christmas.

NOW … here is the problem I have run into …

I have saved and saved to be able to buy this particular ride on toy for Lil Man this year.  Bless his heart he has been through so much and I was really getting excited to see that twinkle in his eye on Christmas morning when he woke up to find this sitting under (or beside) the Christmas tree … (minus the children of course)

This is the problem I have run into …

I made sure everyone in the family knew ‘Santa’ is bringing Lil Man the John Deere Gator pictured above for Christmas. I also made sure they knew that any contributions they choose to make toward purchasing said Gator would be greatly appreciated.  I was sure they all knew what Santa was bringing and they wouldn’t do anything to ’steal’ Santa’s thunder … so to speak.  BOY was I wrong.

My mother, sister, and brother-n-law all took off shopping last Friday. My mother had told me many times over she would help with the purchase of the Gator. While she hasn’t offered to come through with money to help buy the Gator she had not made any indication that she had other plans. I talked with her on Saturday and she said that when Lil Man saw what she had bought him for Christmas he would go wild. That was all I needed to hear!  She wouldn’t tell me what she had bought other than to say it was not the Gator. I wrecked my brain all weekend trying to think of what in the world she could have bought for him that could possibly be more exciting than the Gator he wanted so badly.  This morning she finally told me … my heart is breaking and I’m not sure how to handle this situation. Plans are all ready set for Christmas and to change them would be too much of a hassle for everyone involved. If we were having Christmas at Mama’s on Christmas Day then there would be no problem … Santa’s twinkle would be saved. We’re not … We are having Christmas at Mama’s on Christmas Eve because everyone already has other plans for Christmas Day. I don’t want to hurt my Mama’s feelings. With her health this may be the last Christmas she is with us and I don’t want to spoil it for her … BUT I don’t want it spoiled for Santa either … OK that sounds selfish but Lil Man getting Christmas from his Mo (my Mama) BEFORE he receives Christmas from Santa will definitely put a damper on anything Santa will bring …

Why??  This is WHY … This is what my Mama bought Lil Man for Christmas (minus the children)  …

See what Santa is up against?  What would you do?  All I can do is cry and Santa crying, four days before Christmas, is not pretty.

I’m Thankful For

Thanksgiving is my second all time favorite holiday. I have smelled turkey cooking for the past three days … at the office … where no one is even cooking! Go Figure! At any rate I’m looking forward to the Thanksgiving feast tomorrow and the opportunity to spend the day with those I love.

I try to keep myself on the positive side and not allow my thoughts to linger too long on the things that changed this past year. There are certain things I miss greatly. But in missing those things I have also found a small peace of mind that allows me to truly enjoy the things I have to be thankful for.

This past year the Lord has blessed my life in many ways. I have a beautiful new grandson who is simply out of this world. I still have Lil Man with me and the reassurance that no one is going to be able to come in and rip him out of my life. (My attorney assures me that Lil Man won’t be going anywhere and I trust that!). I have a new home. I have never been without a roof over my head but in my adult years I have never had a roof over my head that I loved enough to actually call home … it was always a house … now I have a home. Somewhere I enjoy going and something I can be proud of. It’s real and it’s beautiful and it’s spacious … it’s home … it is filled with God’s love and spirit. That is what makes it a home.

I will kick off this Thanksgiving holiday, not by cooking all night as I have done in the past, but by taking Lil Man over to Asheville, NC to see Disney on Ice – Finding Nemo.  He is so excited and I can not wait to see his little face lite up when he finally gets to see Mickey Mouse! Oh the joy that little man will bring to my heart tonight by simply being allowed to watch the excitement on his face.  I may not be able to tell you one thing about the show but I’m sure I will be able to tell you ever experssion that little boy shares. I’m ubber excited!

Thanksgiving morning I will rise early to snuggle with Lil Bit while everyone else sleeps in. He starts his day around 5:30am and those early morning smiles, giggles, and snuggles with that precious little boy is better than any cup of latte I could ask for. (I just hope he is feeling better by tomorrow … right now he is one sick little boy … found out yesterday he has pneumonia but we are staying positive that the antibiotics and breathing treatments will kick in fast and he’ll be back to his usual loving little self real soon)

I plan to sit cuddled on the sofa with both Lil Bit and Lil Man and watch the Macy’s Day Parade in it’s entirety. I haven’t watched every minute of that parade in over 20 years.  I’m always busy cooking and baking and preparing for company. NOT this year.  I’m going to my sister’s this year. I’ll make a couple of easy dishes to take along but I’m not doing the BIG cooking this year.

Well … not until Saturday … Saturday I will be making the BIG meal … to celebrate Thanksgiving in my new home. Hopefully with both of my daughters sitting at the table … hopefully … praying … maybe the one who strayed will find her way home … at least for Thanksgiving dinner.

May you and your family be blessed this holiday season and may your Thanksgiving be filled with love, memories, and the spirit of Jesus Christ in your lives.

God Bless you all

He Also Steals My Heart

 

Brady Halloween 2009, originally uploaded by NC_Belle36.

This is the other little boy that I love to no end. He, like Lil Man lives in my home and I have him to look forward to every evening when I go home from work and every morning when I first wake up. He’s precious and the personality he is developing is brighter than any star I have seen in the sky … well almost … there is one star shining brightly that I will get to meet one day.

This is my Brady bug. We call him Buster Brown. I’m not really sure why but it just seems to fit. It is amazing to realize how much this little boy has grown in the past eight months. It is equally hard to believe he is crawling, pulling up, and starting to contemplate taking that first step. I pray I don’t miss his first ventures of walking. Lil Man decided he wanted to go from first steps to full blown walking while I was out of town on business.

Yes … this little boy is my pride and joy. Just like Lil Man he holds a special place in my heart that was made just for him.

See our other Halloween Photos! We went to the Fall Festival at our Church where kids were asked to dress as Biblical Characters.  Lil Man was David. He would tell people he killed a giant with his sling shot and a rock. So Cute!!  Brady Bug was Moses. The basket we used belongs to his Mama. Her grandmother (my Mama) made if  for her about 22 years ago. He was precious!