Thoughts and Concerns

I finally met the sperm donor for the new baby last night.  I know that sounds harsh but I honestly do not like him. I can’t seem to lay my finger on any particular thing I don’t like … I just don’t like him.  I am a first impression type person and his first impression left a lot to be desired.  I see control freak in him.  I see quick to anger, slow to calm down. I see player in him. I see so many negative things that I’m having trouble seeing anything positive.  I’m sure there are good qualities somewhere but I’m having a world of trouble trying to find them. Maybe I’m being an over protective Mom and Grandma but that’s what we’re here for right? We’re here to protect our young, and their young? Am I right??  Stasha is so vulnerable and she seems to attract the ‘bad boys’ so to speak.  I want what’s best for her and I strive daily to make sure she is healthy, to make sure she takes proper care of herself, and that she is taking proper care of Lil Man but sometimes dangit … I just want to snatch every hair on her head off!  I would never do that of course but some days … ahhh some days…

Hopefully Mr. Sperm Donor will do what I think he will do and walk away. I hate to see her hurt … but I would rather see a broken heart than I had to see a broken spirit and I’m afraid that is what he will do … he will break her spirit and kill her desire to fight for herself.  Once he has the full and total control I see him going for … then he will walk away when she feels she has nothing left to fight for.

Should I stop my worry and concern?  Should I be the one to back him into a corner and just give him a good Mama lashing and let him know what will happen when he hurts my daughter OR my grandson?  GRRRRRR  I hate feeling this way.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. citystreams
    Mar 13, 2008 @ 18:15:23

    I wish I knew what to tell you. Your daughter is blessed to have a mom who is so supportive. I hope everything works out for the best.

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