Thoughts and Feelings

It has been over a week now since Stasha’s miscarriage. With each passing day the reality of what happened gets easier. Stasha is doing much better than I expected. Typically she does not handle emotional things very well but I must say that I am very proud of her for the way she has been dealing with the loss of her baby. We talk about what happened and we both do wonder why but we know God had a reason for taking our little Angel when he did and we trust the choice he made in doing so. He has been out strength, our source of comfort, and our will to continue with our daily drone of life knowing full well there will be a day when we will be met at the gates of Heaven to be reunited with the baby that was taken from us without warning.

In other news … Tax season is over and my daily routine is getting back to normal. It still feels kinda weird to go home at 5pm and have time to do whatever I choose to do before it gets dark. This past Thursday I took the day off because Stasha and Lil Man had doctor appointments. It was a beautiful day and being inside just wasn’t an option. We decided to invite our neighbor and her kids to go with us to the park and play. We also decided that if a grill was available we’d have a cookout. It was … we did … and it was exactly what was needed to pick up down spirits. We had a really good time and I have decided that when I do decide it’s time to buy my own home that I want to pay special attention to my yard details.  Instead of having all this grass to keep up I want a rubberized play ground … just like the one at the park. Low maintenance with lots of toys for Lil Man to climb and play on … AND I also want a water park like the one they have installed recently at the park we were at.  It has all kinds of neat water ‘toys’ such as sprayers, sprinklers, and random shoots of water coming out of the ground in various locations throughout the water park. What more could a person ask for? It would be totally awesome to have something like this … right in your own backyard!!

Church is starting to jump on board for Bible School and I’m psyched this year. I will be assisting with the 9-12th grade youth. They are really a great group of kids so I’m looking forward to this experience to be able to share the love of God with these kids.  We always have a great turnout for Bible school. Most nights we have 200+ kids. The ladies of the Church serve dinner every night which is a blessing. I don’t have to worry about rushing home after work to make dinner then trying to get back to Church before the kids march in!  It’s a tough week but it is soooo much fun!

I’m begging for a vacation week this summer but I honestly don’t see it being possible. I can always take a week off to just take a week off … but I want to do something. I would be bored in no time staying home for the sake of just taking a week off.  Maybe we’ll go camping or something relatively inexpensive … unless of course someone out there in blog land is feeling generous enough to fund … oh say a week at the beach or better yet … a week at DisneyLand … crazy I know but you can’t blame a girl for trying!

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. BOSSY
    Apr 29, 2008 @ 08:17:30

    So so sorry about the miscarriage. Truly.

  2. Bella
    Apr 29, 2008 @ 09:40:05

    (((((((((HUGS))))))))))

    I am so sorry. I’ve had two miscarriages & I know that it hurts so badly & you never really recover completely.

    http://silentgrief.proboards70.com/index.cgi

    This is a board for women who have lost children/babies/miscarriages. There are grandma’s on the boards also ~ if you or Stasha find yourselves wanting to talk, ask questions, anything ~ it’s a really good place to look.

  3. Jeanelle
    Apr 29, 2008 @ 12:50:10

    That water park sounds like a blast! I remember VBS too well – you’re a saint for volunteering your time to that!

    Stasha will be in my prayers, I’ve had many friends recover from miscarriages, but it’s not easy.

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